Saturday, December 24, 2005

Christmas Eve

I went to hear Rich Nathan tonight. The message was great. Christmas is here.

I hope that God miraculously brings me that special someone very soon. I have to grab me a neat sandwhich for I have one more service to attend. I will serve and hang out with my friends.

I just hope I get that special someone very soon. I don't want my eyes set on anyone in particular. I want the man to make the move totally if possible. I just don't want to end up in another mess. I want a hookup not a regretful screwup.

Special Someone

I really desire that special someone for Christmas. I hope God brings it very soon. I hope to get married and not just settle for someone who is a good con artist.

Friday, December 23, 2005

Blessings

Tonight was a blessing to see my old buddy Christian, who I have not seen in a few years. Sure we have talked a few times and emailed, however I got to hang out with him tonight. I went to Steak and Shake and then went and saw Chronicles of Narnia the 2nd time. There was one problem I took a shower yesterday evening. I however have been sweating. I changed shirts put on deodorant and Shower to Shower and put Bath and Body Works stuff on. I however discovered that Chris Camera was alergic to perfume. I however am too self conscious about armpit odor.

Tomorrow I will attend a main service and a J-House for Christmas Eve. I will then attend church with my parents on Sunday.

I am glad I got to see Christian, I however am still hoping God brings me my Prince Charming. I hope he does it by Christmas Evening somehow. That would be a great present.

Today

It looks like I will see my friend Christian today. I have not seen him in 2 yrs. In other news I think of my friends Glen and Annette who have really suffered a loss for some good friends of theirs lost a daughter in an auto accident last weekend. Getting an email from Glen, made me realize that there is more to be concerned about that whether or not someone tarnished my reputation. God is in control of it all.

At least I have 3 days off. I plan on attending a main service and perhaps a J-House service tomorrow night. Then go and attend my parents church on Christmas Eve.

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Let It Snow, Let it Snow

I hope that this friggin 40 degree temperature does not melt all the snow. We have had it the whole month. I hope we get some nice snow, not annoying snow for Christmas.

One of my coworkers was a little too excited for this annoying mild weather. It could be worse with an ice storm. I however would like the snow to stay on the ground.

Christmas Preparations

Today

I help cleaned, do laundry and am now wrapping gifts. I am thankful for decent weather. I just hope that the snow stays and it snows a little on Christmas.

I hope my friend who I have not seen in 2 years calls me by noon Sat. I need to know how to plan.

I am hungry.

Finally I sure hope I get that special someone by Christmas morn. I will say that I don't have my eye on anyone for I don't want to put eggs in 1 basket. It would be great if God just did all the work. For he is better than anything Santa could do. This is what I desire the most.

Hopefully God can provide me with a wonderful caring man who loves God with all his heart and would give me the respect I deserve.

A few days before Christmas

Recently I have been looking at things. First of all within the last few weeks I am in the process of learning that I am not in this world to please people. I would like another job but just because I am way over qualified does that really matter. Hell, if I want to have a relationship that would be fine with me before getting a "career". Thank God I am in a diverse small group with people who all have different gifts and how they thrive. In all due respects I am thankful for them.

One lesson that I am learning is not to be so concerned what is thought of me. God knows the truth of things that have happened. I am thankful for my measely even though another job would be nice, however I can be thankful for it and not be concerned that despite my Bachelors that I have this job. Who cares what people thinks, even though I wish God would reveal the truth of some things. I am quite happy about writing.

On another note, I have to clean for company who will hopefully show up soon within the next few days. Finally I hope God gives me that special someone this year. I don't want to have my eyes set on anyone for that has got me nowhere. Some guys just want to flirt.

I just hope I get a special someone.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Twas The Time Before Christmas

Twas the time before Christmas,
When all on the earth
People were awaiting a very special birth.
The birth would be that, of Jesus the blessed light,
Who would be born in Bethlehem one special night.
Born a gift to a dark world that needed a light,
This child’s birth would make that night a holy night.
When the blessed light came it was meant to be,
For this light brings peace on earth to all you see.
Jesus, God’s gift to all, born to the Virgin Mary,
He was born to die for the sins we all carry.
We would no longer live under the law and cope,
For Jesus Christ was born to be the earth’s true hope.
The blessed light was born not to live but to die,
He did this out of his great love for you and I.
This Christmas lets remember the reason for the day,
The blessed light came to take our sins away.
Merry Christmas Remember Jesus is the reason,
We have to celebrate the season.

Without Easter/No Christmas

A few years ago, I heard Kay Arthur bring up the point there had to be an Easter in order to have a Christmas

For Jesus was born to die so that we might have eternal life.

Anyway, here is a poem I wrote after watching the Passion Of The Christ

Not Many

Not many
Would be willing

To endure
All the torture and agony

He willingly went through

He however
Was more
Than willing
To suffer all
This torture and agony

In order
For him
To give us eternal life
Instead of death

He did this
Out of his love
For us

He loved us so much

He willingly went through Hell
So we would not have to go there.

People Come And People Go

Here is a poem I wrote a few years ago

People come and people go

Some you just get to know
For just a short period of time
You have the opportunity to work with them
Experiencing extremely unique things abroad
It happens because God choses it to be
This is a wonderful experience you share with them
You get to know them through this experience
As well through the circumstances that God led you to
They are then led to another place
They must go, even though you barely get to know them
It is too soon for them to move,
However this is what they feel need to do

People come and then they go
Sometimes onto newer adventures
Yet sometimes they graduate
From this thing called life

One was in your life
For a short period of time
However in a time
When you need someone
To be there
After you suffer a traumatic injury
He is there for you
During the time of recovery
He then leaves
You show up at an important event
Then don’t hear of him for a long time
You wonder what is up with him
You might run into that person
Maybe a few times but he disappears
A while later you get the news not expected
About how he suddenly dies and goes Home
Even though you saw him around six months ago

People come and then they go
Sometimes onto newer adventures
Yet sometimes they graduate
From this thing called life

Tall Tales

Here is a poem I wrote a few months ago. I know it is sarcastic.

Tall tales
Can be told
Through
Emails
And these things
Can be tales
For it is not what they seem
Might seem
Like a dream come true
But once it ends
It could turn into a very dark tale
For it was not a fairy tale
But a tall tale
Out in cyberspace
With a two faced fake prince
Who could be a character
For sure
Who could charm you
With those tall tales
O so absurd
However
The fake prince
Has two faces
Which stinks
For when he
Get tired
He does not
Stick with you
No he is just
Through
And does not even
Care
Or dare
To be true
No he is not a true prince
But a fake prince
With two faces.

Desire

It is said
That you will give me the desires of my heart if I delight myself in you
To start with
I have to be totally
Honest with you
I guess
You want me
To be
Honest
I desire you
To send
Me that companion
Not just any man
But one who
Would be
Good for me
I really desire
You send me one soon

Something I wrote back in March

Had he not
Caught me by surprise
Especially the first time
When it was inopportune
I don’t think I would
Be thinking about him
Like that

Words

Words often flow
As a way
To say
What I mean
If it were
Not for words
I don’t know what I would do

God you have already revealed empty wells
Show me where else you need for me to go

Chips

What was that all about with that whole carbonated water and potato chip business?

Chips are enjoyable once in a while and so is carbonation.

However what was that all about. Look at where it got us.

Nothing New Under The Sun

There is a saying that there is nothing new under The Sun.

However a lot has changed in the years since this earth was created.

Technology has evolved quite a bit since then making it more possible

For both the good the bad and even ugly stuff happen.

Poem I wrote 3 months ago

Looking at my emails
Can be somewhat
Troublin
I look at how there is a page ful
Just from one with a fool
It was fun
But now it makes me sad
For a relationship
Started on a question
Of chips
Turned into a heartbrake
I should have noticed
Red flags
However all I see
Are pages ful
From a fool
Who does not care
About integrity
One would know
Whether
He really
Knows integrity

More on wishes.

I hope the snow stays till Dec 27. I hope it does not warm up too much. I however do not want the weather that came last year for I would like to go to Christmas Eve Service and hopefully see a friend I have not seen in 2 yrs.

I hope that special someone comes to me by Christmas morning, whoever it is. I want more than a blow up or a stuffed animals, even though I always appreciate stuffed animals.

Monday, December 19, 2005

Christmas Wishes

Here are my 2 Christmas Wishes. One is that God helps me to forget about the mistakes I made late spring and summer, yet at least decide I will avoid anything close to it. I have learned from that mistake. The one thing about it, is it would not have been possible 15 to 20 yrs ago for this stuff to happen as they did. I love technology, however technology can be used to hurt people emotionally as I have learned from my own experience. It would be nice if God found a just way to deal with this whole mess. I don't want to hurt the other party, however if God could find a merciful way to deal with this party that would have been great

I talked to a friend yesterday about stuff and looking back I might have wasted time missing Wife Swap last week. I watched it tonight after the end of a Christmas get together with neighbors. I got some candy and new bears. The bears are cuddly and don't play games.

Despite my issues with men especially after what happened I still desire someone special. It would be great if God came through this weekend with someone special. I desire someone, however I have decided to let God do the picking and let him do it all, which means do not mess with email addresses for sure. I know God forgives me for my folly even though I cannot forgive myself.

Sunday, December 18, 2005

Things I am thankful for

Jesus
A place to stay
My job
My church
My small group
My true friends
The extra storage space on hotmail